You can predict an airplane.
If you respect an airplane it will be good to you.
Airplanes don't have PMS to battle.
Airplane skin doesn't wrinkle as badly.
An airplane won't criticize your performance.
Airplanes don't comment on your piloting skills.
An airplane doesn't care where you were last night.
Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you have flown before.
Airplanes don't cost as much money.
Airplanes don't get pregnant.
Airplanes are faster than most women.
Airplanes don't take forever to warm up.
Airplanes don't spend hours in front of a mirror.
Airplanes like to do it inverted.
Airplanes won't keep you waiting.
Airplanes won't insist you shower before entering it.
Airplanes don't cry when you break up with them.
Airplanes don't talk back.
Airplanes don't get headaches.
Airplanes don't take half of everything.
Airplanes never stand you up.
It's easier to get "trim" in an airplane.
Airplanes go down ... women just bring you down.
An airplane is cheaper to maintain.
You can't get diseases from an airplane.
Airplanes don't care if you fart.
Airplanes have better struts.
An airplane doesn't care who yanks it's stick.
You can keep an airplane from stalling.
Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch.
You can approach an airplane from the REAR.
You can proudly show your airplane inside and out.
An airplane won't slap you for being a "bush pilot".
An airplane doesn't ask you to put on a raincoat before entry.
You can easily leave an airplane before sunrise.
Airplane exhaust fumes smell better.
Airplanes lose weight faster.
You don't always have to "hand prop" an airplane.
Airplanes don't care if you fall asleep while in them.
Airplanes don't care if you enter thru the back door.
An airplane does not get mad if you "touch and go".
An airplane will not get mad if you ride someone else's airplane.
An airplane's cockpit is cleaner.
At least a DC-10 sucks!
You can calculate the peak performance of an airplane.
An airplane is easy to roll over.
You can still ride a fifty year old airplane.
Up to five people can ride in an airplane.
Airplanes expect to be tied down.
Airplanes can get high without throwing up.
Airplanes last longer.
Airplane's don't need as much lubrication.
Airplane's don't droop after ten years.
Airplanes are easy to love.
You don't have to sweet-talk an airplane.
You can always tell when an airplane is going to give out.
An airplane moves when you tell it to.
Airplanes give a better ride for the money.
An airplane goes anywhere you direct it to.
Wide body airplanes are more attractive.
An airplane will kill you quick...a woman takes her time.
An airplane takes less time to turn around.
An airplane does not object to a preflight inspection.
Airplanes don't make you "pull-out" to eject.
You can change the looks of an airplane.
Airplanes come with manuals to explain their operation.
Airplanes can handle thrust better.
Airplanes don't scream.
A 747 can keep you up for 14 hours.
You can adjust an airplane's attitude easily.
Women have more drag than lift.
An airplane's payload can be calculated.
Airplanes have strict weight and balance limits.
Airplanes have ash trays and tray tables.
When you put fuel into an airplane, it does not spit it out.
Sometimes you can ride airplanes for free
It's easier to understand what an airplane needs.
You can fly an airplane any time of the month
Airplanes don't come with in-laws.
Airplanes don't whine unless something is really wrong
Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you have flown
Airplanes and pilots both arrive at the same time.
Airplanes don't mind if you look at other airplanes, or if you buy airplane magazines
If your airplane is too loose, you can tighten it
It's always OK to use tie downs on your airplane
However, when airplanes go quiet, just like women, it's a bad thing.