There is a fire at the alphabet spaghetti factory. If it explodes it could
spell disaster.
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My uncle was always safety conscious.
At the end of every day, he would take out all the plugs and switch off all
the lights.
Perhaps that's why he got sacked from being an air traffic controller.
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Had a collection for bulimics at work today
...we passed a bucket round.
(you wouldn't believe how much we fetched up)
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I wouldn't say my missus was fat, but I took a picture of her last New
Year's Eve and its still printing.
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I was in a bus crash once. It happened outside Mr & Mrs Smiths' house and Mr
& Mrs Balls' house.
Luckily, I was dragged out by the Smiths.
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I was voted most arrogant kid at my school.
Well I guess that's just something else I'm top in.
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I like to start my day with a nice cuddle and a shag.
Although I think he'd probably prefer a walk and a game of fetch.
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A friend of mine is a chess player. We went out for dinner the other day,
the table had a check tablecloth on it. I asked him to pass the salt and it
took him two hours
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Did you hear about the flasher who was thinking of retiring?
He decided to stick it out for one more year.
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Man goes to Marks & Spencers to buy his wife a maternity bra.... Shop
assistant ask`s "What bust?". Man says "The condom"
Topic: Jokes (Read 459 times)