An Irish farmer named Seamus had a car accident.
In court, the lorry company's hot-shot solicitor was questioning
Seamus..'Didn't you say to the Police at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine?'
asked the solicitor.
Seamus responded: 'Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded
my favourite cow, Bessie, into the...'
'I didn't ask for any details', the solicitor interrupted. 'Just answer
the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident,'I'm fine!'?'
Seamus said, 'Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was
driving down the road....'
The solicitor interrupted again and said, 'Your Honour, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question.'
By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Seamus's answer and
said to the solicitor: 'I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favourite
cow, Bessie'.
Seamus thanked the Judge and proceeded. 'Well as I was saying, I
had just loaded Bessie, my favourite cow, into the trailer and was driving her
down the road when this huge lorry and trailer came through a stop sign and
hit my trailer right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was
thrown into the other. I was hurt, very bad like, and didn't want to
move.
However, I could hear old Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in
terrible pain just by her groans.
Shortly after the accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He
could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her. After he looked
at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the
eyes.
Then the policeman came across the road, gun still in hand, looked at
me, and said, 'How are you feeling?'
'Now what the F*ck would you have said?