Topic: The Vicar's Salary

[Clive]

At Sunday church the local Vicar explains that he must move on to a larger congregation that will pay him more.

There is a hush within the congregation. No one wants him to leave because he is so popular.


Fred Smith, who owns several car dealerships, stands up and proclaims:
If the Vicar stays, I will provide him with a new Honda every year and his wife with an MPV to transport their children!'

The congregation sighs in appreciation and applauds.

Sam Brown, a successful entrepreneur and publican, stands and says,
If the Vicar will stay on here, I'll personally double his salary and establish a foundation to guarantee private secondary school education of his children!'


More sighs and loud applause.

Agnes Jones, age 88, stands and announces with a smile,
If the Vicar stays, I will give him sex.'

There is total silence.



The Preacher, blushing, asks her:
'Mrs. Jones, you're a wonderful and holy lady, whatever possessed you to say that?'

Agnes's 90-year old husband, Joe, is now trying to hide, holding his forehead with the palm of his hand and shaking his head from side to side, while his wife replies:


'Well, I just asked my husband how we could help, and he said, '     "F**k him'"

 
 

[Simon]

[Rik]