Topic: Blonde Jokes Can Go Here

[Barra]

What do you call a blonde with more than one brain cell?.................










.................. a golden labrador

[princeofdarkness]

thats a cool joke at the top sandra  

[Sandra]

Yes it was a true story too PoD, Serenitys then boyfriend told me about it  

[Serenity]

:bitch:  If he DID Im gonna strangle him   ... if I ever find out where he escaped to  :tony:  

[Simon]

Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their own stock. The brunette balances their checkbook, then takes their last $600 dollars out west to another ranch where a man has a prize bull for sale. Upon leaving, she tells her sister, "When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home."

The brunette arrives at the man's ranch, inspects the bull, and decides she does want to buy it. The man tells her that he can sell it for $599, no less. After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news. She walks into the telegraph office, and says, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home."
 
The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to help her, then adds, "It's just 99 cents a word. Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette only has $1 left. She realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word. After thinking for a few minutes, she nods, and says, "I want you to send her the word, 'comfortable.'"

The telegraph operator shakes his head. "How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her the word, 'comfortable'?"

The brunette explains, "My sister's blonde, she'll read it very slow."

[Camstop]

Two bored casino dealers were waiting at a craps table. A very
attractive blonde woman arrived and bet twenty thousand dollars on a
single roll of the dice. She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel
much luckier when I'm completely nude."
With that she stripped from her neck down, rolled the dice and yelled,
"Mama needs new clothes!"
Then she hollered... "YES! YES! I WON! I WON!"
She jumped up and down and hugged each of the dealers.
She then picked up all the money and clothes and quickly departed.
The dealers just stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them
asked, "What did she roll?"
The other answered, "I don't know - I thought YOU were watching!"


MORAL : Not all blondes are dumb, but all men are the same !

 

[Simon]

[greenking]

Blonde to supermarket Manager:- "I want a refund for this bottle of vinegar i brought the other day....It has lumps in it"


Manager:- "Madam....they are pickled onions"  

[greenking]

1.  Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one?
(You have to hollow out the head.)

2.  Why won't they hire blondes as pharmacists?
(They keep breaking the prescription bottles in the typewriters.)

3.  Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio?
(It took her a month to realize she could play it in the afternoon.)

4.  What happened to the blonde ice hockey team?
(They drowned during Spring Training.)

5.  Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
(To see what was on the other side.)

6.  How did the blonde die drinking milk?
(The cow stepped on her.)

7.  How did the blonde burn her nose?
(Bobbing for French fries.)

8.  Why do blondes have more fun?
(They're easier to amuse.)

9.  What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer?
(Frosted flakes.)

10.  Why can't blondes put in light bulbs?
(They keep breaking them with their hammers.)

11.  Did you hear about the blonde that shot an arrow into the air?
(She missed.)

12.  What is it when a blonde blows into another blonde's ear?
(Data transfer.)

13.  Why did the blonde resolve to have only three children?
(Because she read that one child out of every four born was Chinese.)

14.  Why did the blonde put make-up on her forehead?
(She wanted everyone to know that she was able to make up her mind.)

15.  Why did the blonde ask her friends to save their burned-out light bulbs?
(She needed them for the darkroom she was building.)

16.  Why are Asians so smart?
(No blondes.)

17.  What is the biggest advantage to marrying a blonde?
(You get to park in the Handicapped Zone)

[Adept]

at all of them

[white fly]

3 blonds wanted to cross a river , and they all had 1 wish each . so the 1st blond goes up to the river and wishes that she had long arms to swing across , she looses grip , drops & drowns .
The 2nd blond goes up to the river and wishes that she had long legs to step across , so she slips , falls in and drowns .
the 3rd blond wishes for some hair dye , so she dyes her hair brown and walks over the bridge !!!!! 8)

[Sandra]

You'll fit in well in here White Fly  

[Serenity]

Not Another "Blonde" basher  >


By the way Fly! if you are going to have a go at us ... spell Blonde correctly  or you will never pass your GCSE's    



   

[white fly]

no offence Serenity , but being a blonde i'm supprised you remember to put the E on the end ,




              Yours faithfully

                                           FLY

[Serenity]

Someone hold me back  > Or I am liable to be prosecuted for child abuse!!!!




















   cheeky tinker