Topic: Blonde Jokes Can Go Here

[Simon]

 

[Den]

 

[Den]

There were these two blonds and they locked their keys in their car.

The one blonde says to the other, "What do we do? Do we get a coat hanger and pick the lock?"

The other one replied, "No, people will think we're trying to break in."

The other one said, "Well do we get a knife and cut the rubber and pop the lock?"

The other one answered," No, people will think we're too stupid to use the coat hanger."

The other one said, "Well we better think of something quick because it's starting to rain and the sunroof is open."   

[Clive]

 

[Simon]

 

[Den]

One day a blonde came home from school and came to her mother and said, "Hey, Mommy! Mommy!

Today in school we learned to count.

The other kids could only count to three but I can count to Ten..... 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10!"

The mother responds, "Very good honey."

The blonde asks, "Is that because I'm a blonde mommy?"

And the mother responds, "Yes dear."

Next day the blonde came home and went to her mother and said, "Today in school we learned our ABCs!

The other kids could only get to D but I can get to K! .... A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K!"

The mother says, "Very good honey."

The blonde then asked.

"Is that because I'm a blonde, Mommy?"

The mother responds, "Yes dear."

The third day the blonde come home from school and said to her mother, "Mommy today in school we went swimming!

But I was the only one who had breasts.

Is that because I'm a blonde, Mommy?"

And the mother responds, "No Honey, it's because you're twenty five."   

[Simon]

 

[Clive]

 

[Den]

An old blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake...

He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.

After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"

The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.

In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:

The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.

The bouncer is a blonde girl with a 'Billy-Club'.

I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.

The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.

The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.

Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy... Do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?"

The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, "No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times..."       

[Simon]

 

[Clive]

  

[Den]

2 blondes traveling to Florida to see Disney World see a sign that says Disney left.


They turned the car around and headed home. 

[Clive]