I used to suffer from Kleptomania, but now I take something for it.
I can't remember having amnesia.
I met Van Gogh in a pub,and i said "can I buy you a drink ?", "no thanks" he said "I've got one ear".
Your never alone with a clone
I used to be Auto_didactic but my teacher died.
People who suffer from bulimia, make me sick.
I told my wife "the sexiest thing was her waist line", so she grew a very big one
My wife told me to grin and bare it, but I got arrested for exposure.
I used to be big headed, but now I'm perfect
A man caught driving a Ferrari at 120mph,was charged with Driving Under the Influence of affluence.
You are never alone with Schizophrenia or a mirror.
Menopause is a woman past her swell buy date.
The best way to loose weight is to move the TV far from the kitchen.
Men do be afraid that you are "funny", wear an earing just like mummy.
Why do birds fly south for the winter, because its too far to walk.
Three lefts make a right.
Your never alone with a mirror.
Do you think your wife knows "what is the largest state in the USA", "I don't know , I'll ask her".
Ladies, show us British infidels that you hate us, by covering all your hair