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Author Topic: One-liners  (Read 36166 times)

Offline Simon

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #30 on: May 06, 2015, 11:08 »
:bawl:
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Offline Clive

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #31 on: May 06, 2015, 13:59 »
 :laugh:
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Offline Rodders

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #32 on: June 02, 2015, 23:34 »
Apparently, double-barreled names come about when both parents want to keep their surnames, according to my friend Paddy Murphy-Murphy.
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Offline Simon

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #33 on: June 03, 2015, 07:08 »
 :)x
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Offline Clive

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #34 on: June 03, 2015, 15:26 »
 ;D
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Offline Rodders

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #35 on: June 09, 2015, 13:59 »
My local pub is organizing a Hop fest this summer.  I'm not sure whether it's a beer festival or Heather Mills' birthday.  :dunno:
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Offline Simon

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #36 on: June 09, 2015, 14:16 »
Ouch!  ;D
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Offline Clive

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #37 on: June 09, 2015, 14:39 »
 :o:
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Offline Rodders

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #38 on: June 11, 2015, 22:01 »
Last night I was sat on the edge of the bed, pulling off my boxers when the wife said to me, "Darling, please don't do that to the dogs."
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Offline Rodders

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #39 on: June 11, 2015, 22:02 »
I scared the postman today by going to the door completely naked.  I'm not sure what startled him the most, my naked body, or the fact that I knew where he lived.
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Offline Rodders

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #40 on: June 11, 2015, 22:07 »
I got so sick of the Trick or Treaters last Halloween that I turned off the light and pretended I wasn't at home.  B*ll*cks to the ships.  My lighthouse, my rules.
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Offline Simon

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #41 on: June 11, 2015, 22:31 »
 :laugh:
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Offline Clive

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #42 on: June 12, 2015, 16:14 »
 :laugh:  Love it!
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Offline Rodders

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #43 on: June 22, 2015, 00:24 »
After almost a year in a coma, my wife is having to start learning the basics again: how to walk, how to talk, how to feed herself and how to not argue with me at the top of the stairs again.
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Offline Clive

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Re: One-liners
« Reply #44 on: June 22, 2015, 08:50 »
 :pmsl:
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