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Author Topic: Home Schooled  (Read 471 times)

Offline Clive

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Home Schooled
« on: August 06, 2015, 11:13 »
Most of our generation (50+) were HOME SCHOOLED in many ways.
 
1.   My mother taught me - TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL  DONE   .
      "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I've just finished cleaning."
 
2.   My mother taught me - RELIGION .
      "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
 
3.   My father taught me about - TIME TRAVEL .
      "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
 
4.   My father taught me - LOGIC .
      " Because I said so, that's why."
 
5.   My mother taught me - MORE LOGIC   .
      "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the shops with me."
 
6.   My mother taught me - FORESIGHT .
      "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
 
7.   My father taught me - IRONY .
      "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
 
8.   My mother taught me about the science of - OSMOSIS   .
      "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
 
9.   My mother taught me about - CONTORTIONISM .
      "Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
 
10.   My mother taught me about - STAMINA .
      "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
 
11.   My mother taught me about - WEATHER .
      "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
 
12.   My mother taught me about - HYPOCRISY .
      "If I told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!"
 
13.   My father taught me the - CIRCLE OF LIFE .
      "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out..."
 
14.   My mother taught me about - BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION   .
      "Stop acting like your father!"
 
15.   My mother taught me about - ENVY .
      "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
 
16.   My mother taught me about - ANTICIPATION .
      "Just wait until we get home."
 
17.   My mother taught me about - RECEIVING .
      "You are going to get it from your father when you get home!"
 
18.   My mother taught me - MEDICAL SCIENCE .
      "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
 
19.   My mother taught me - ESP .
      "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
 
20.   My father taught me - HUMOUR .
      "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
 
21.   My mother taught me - HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT   .
      "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
 
22.   My mother taught me - GENETICS .
      "You're just like your father."
 
23.   My mother taught me about my - ROOTS .
      "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
 
24.   My mother taught me - WISDOM .
      "When you get to be my age, you'll understand.
 
25.   My father taught me about - JUSTICE   .
      "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"
 

Offline Simon

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Re: Home Schooled
« Reply #1 on: August 06, 2015, 12:13 »
Brilliant!   ;D
Many thanks to all our members, who have made PC Pals such an outstanding success!   :thumb:


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