The other night, Sheila was invited out for a night with "the girls." she told her husband that she would be home by midnight , "I promise!"
Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy.
Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, Sheila headed for home. Just as she got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times.
Quickly, realizing her husband would probably wake up, she cuckooed another 9 times. Shelia was really proud of herself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution.
Next morning Sheila's husband asked her what time she got in, and she told him "Midnight ". He didn't seem annoyed at all. Whew! Got away with that one!
Then he said, "We need a new cuckoo clock."
When Sheila asked him why, he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said, "Oh, s**t.", cuckooed 4 more times, cleared it's throat, cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted."