An Irishman is stumbling through the woods, blind drunk, when he comes upon a preacher baptising people in the river. The drunk proceeds into the water, bumping into the preacher on the way in.
The preacher turns around and despite being almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, asks the drunk, "Are you ready to find Jesus?"
The drunk shouts, "Yes, oi am!"
So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. He pulls him back up and asks, "Brother, have you found Jesus?"
The drunk replies, "No, oi haven't found Jesus!"
The preacher, shocked at the answer, dunks him again but for a little longer. He again pulls him out of the water and asks, "Have you found Jesus, my brother?"
The drunk answers, "No, oi haven't found Jesus!"
By this time, the preacher is almost at his wits end and dunks the Irishman again, but this time holds him under for about 30 seconds. Then, when he begins thrashing his arms and legs around, the preacher pulls him up again and asks, "For the love of God, have you found Jesus?"
The drunk staggers upright, wipes his eyes, coughs up some water, catches his breath and says to the preacher, "Are you sure this is where he fell in?"