Topic: News from Scotland

[Clive]

A salesman drove into a small town where a circus was in progress.
 A sign  read: 'Don't miss Bruce The Amazing Scotsman'. The salesman
bought a  ticket and sat down. There,  on centre stage, was a table
with 3 walnuts on it.Standing  next to it was an old Scotsman, suddenly
the old man lifted his kilt, whipped out a huge willy and smashed all
3 walnuts with 3 mighty swings! The  crowd erupted in applause as the
elderly Scot was carried off on the  shoulders of the crowd.

 
Ten  years later the salesman visited the same little town and saw a
faded poster for the same circus and the same sign 'Don't miss Bruce
The Amazing Scotsman'. He  couldn't believe the old guy was still alive,
much less still doing his  act! He  bought a ticket. Again, the centre ring
was illuminated.This  time, however, instead of walnuts,3 coconuts
were placed on the  table. The  Scotsman stood before them, then
suddenly lifted his kilt and shattered the  coconuts with 3 swings of his
amazing member.The  crowd went wild! Flabbergasted, the salesman
requested a meeting with him after the show.

 
'You're  incredible!' he told the Scotsman. 'But I have to know something.
You're older now, why switch from walnuts to coconuts
'Well  laddie,' said the Scot, 'Ma eyes are nae whit they wus'

[Simon]