No MB I disagree with those who say "count your blessing" many who misuse this old adage are either defeatists
or have not many problems .I think where you are concerned "walk a mile in my shoes"would be more apt.
Your battle is as worrying and frustrating as anyone who is facing a battle of any significance and to (even with good intentions us this qoute are wrong,when any of us face any challenge which affects our lives in such an important way and face the prospect of losing anything so basic as the roof over our heads you have every right to feel as you do.
When an event dominates our lives so much that it takes over our lives or makes us feel as you do then in one way or another you need some support,even if its a voice which is on your side,which listens.This can have dramatic effects on how we view a situation or may help give us that bit of strength when things look so beyond and resolve.
No matter what the problem is MB somewhere there has to be an answer and by the sound of it you need either some help or a break from it,but if something is dominating your mind day in day out,for months or years on end this can be soul destroying or will give you even more determination to get through it or win the day.
I admire your courage I admire your self depricating attitude.
If your battle has,and I suspect meets most if not more than I have stated it is not insignificant.it sounds a little hollow but I really hope you pace yourself and try (and its easier said than done) to give your mind a littlle break now and again,it would appear the odds are against you.this is the kind of battle which is sweeter when you finally can rest in thhe releif thats its over and you have some form of victory nder your belt.
I sincerely hope that you can take a break now and again to recoup your strength,both physically and mentally and find the elusive answer to all of this,because no matter what it it.MB......There is one and your more likely to discover it if you are refreshed and clear thinking.
I also hope that,the little bit of luck,we all need from time to time.comes your way and soon.
Good Luck and it sems apt...Rome wasnt built in a day
David
Its not the challange we face which becomes our enemy,its the fear anxiety,and all the emotins which we are forced to face and they can become demons if allowed to get out of control...to handle something on your own will either make us or break us......Im confident that with you,you have the attributes to endure to the end which in your case could turn out to be ,A Begining