Topic: Blonde Jokes Can Go Here

[Camstop]

[Serenity]

I dont care    na na na na na      

[Rodders]

I hear Serenity took part in a womens swimming competition last week - 10 lengths of the pool - breast stroke.  Apparently, she finished a good 20 minutes behind all the other girls, and then complained that they'd been using their arms!  

[Simon]

Three blondes were taking a walk in the country when they came upon a line of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those must be deer tracks!" The second blonde said, "No, stupid, anyone can tell those are rabbit tracks!" The third blondie said, "No, you idiots, those are horse tracks!" They where still arguing ten minutes later when a train hit them.




Fifteen minutes into the flight from Kansas City to Toronto, the captain announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, one of our engines has failed. There is nothing to worry about. Our flight will take an hour longer than scheduled, but we still have three engines left."

Thirty minutes later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and the flight will take an additional two hours. But don't worry . . . we can fly just fine on two engines."

An hour later the captain announced, "One more engine has failed and our arrival will be delayed another three hours. But don't worry... we still have one engine left."

A young blonde passenger turned to the man in the next seat and remarked, "If we lose one more engine, we'll be up here all day!"

[Clive]

Canadian Blonde

Norman and his blonde wife live in Calgary. One winter morning while listening to the radio, they hear the announcer say, "We are going to
have 8 to 10 centimeters of snow today. You must park your car on the even numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through."
Norman's wife goes out and moves her car.
A week later while they are eating breakfast, the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 10 to 12 centimeters of snow today. You must park your car on the odd numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through."
Norman's wife goes out and moves her car again.
The next week they are having breakfast again, when the radio announcer says, "We are expecting 12 to 14 centimeters of snow today. You must
park..........." then the electric power goes out.
Norman's wife is very upset, and with a worried look on her face she says, "Honey, I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I
need to park on so the snowplow can get through?"
With the love and understanding in his voice like all men who are married to Blondes exhibit, Norman says, "Why don't you just leave it in
the garage this time?"

[Camstop]

[Serenity]

flipin blonde bashers!

[Michelle]

Yeah Grrrrr

Funny though

[Simon]

[Clive]

A fellow nurse at my hospital received a call from an anxious woman.

"I'm diabetic, and I'm afraid I'm having an insulin reaction."

"Are you light-headed?" my colleague asked.

"No," the caller answered, "I'm a brunette."

[Clive]

The bride lay in bed on the first night of their honeymoon while her husband stood at the bedroom window, gazing at the stars.

"Come to bed, darling," she whispered after some time had passed.

"Not likely," replied the blonde groom, "my mother told me that this would be the best night of my life and I'm not going to miss a minute of it."

[Simon]

I didn't know you were blonde when you got married, Clive!  

[Simon]

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs & stops to entertain at a bar in a small town. He's going through his usual run of stupid blonde jokes, when a big blonde woman in the 4th row stands on her chair and yells,

"I've heard just about enough of your stupid blonde jokes, a*****e! What makes you think you can stereotype blondes that way? What does a person's physical attributes have to do with their worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep blond women like me from being respected at work and in my community and from reaching my full potential as a person... because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes, but women in general ...all in the name of humor!"

Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to apologize, when the blonde pipes up,

"You stay out of this mister, I'm talking to that little b*****d on your knee!"

[Simon]

There were 11 women hanging onto a rope that came down from a plane. Ten were blonde, and one was a brunette.

They all decided that one person should jump because if they didn't then the rope would break and everyone would die.

No one could decide who should go, so finally the brunette said, "I'll get off."

After a really touching speech from the brunette saying she would get off, all of the blondes started clapping?.

[Simon]

A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it. "That is highly unlikely," says the doctor.

"Please, show me," So she takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. Then she pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams, and so on and so forth.

Finally the doctor looks at her and says, "You're not really a brunette are you? You're really a blonde, right?"

She looks surprised and says, "Yes, Doctor!!" "I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken."