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Author Topic: Groaner thread  (Read 190399 times)

Offline Rik

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #705 on: February 23, 2011, 10:52 »
Make that a double.  :aarrgh:
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Offline Simon

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #706 on: February 28, 2011, 09:48 »
A Scotsman, an Englishman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, an Aussie, a Yank, a Kiwi, a Springbok, an Egyptian, a Jap, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Greek, a Russian, an Estonian, a German, an Italian, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a Finn, a Norwegian, an Israeli, a Romanian, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Czech, and a Swiss all went to a nightclub.....
 
The doorman said "Sorry, I can't let you in without a Thai"
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Offline Clive

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #707 on: February 28, 2011, 09:53 »
 :aarrgh:

Offline Simon

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #708 on: February 28, 2011, 10:07 »
:hehe:
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Offline Rik

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #709 on: February 28, 2011, 10:13 »
I'm with Clive, but not the sheep.  :devil:
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Offline Simon

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #710 on: February 28, 2011, 10:21 »
;D
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Offline Clive

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #711 on: March 08, 2011, 17:39 »
A bloke starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks. First
is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds.
 
As he does this a huge fish jumps out and bites
him. To show who is boss, he beats it to death with a
spade.
 
Realizing his employer won't be best pleased he
disposes of the fish by feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat
anything.
 
Moving on to the second job of clearing out the Chimp
house, he is attacked by the chimps who pelt him with
coconuts.
 
He swipes at two chimps with a spade killing them
both. What can he do? Feed them to the lions, he says to
himself, because lions eat anything..
 
 
 
He hurls the corpses into the lion enclosure.
 
He moves on to the last job which is
to collect honey from the South
American Bees. As soon as he starts he is
attacked by the bees. He grabs
the spade and smashes the bees
to a pulp. By now he knows what to do
and shovels them into the lions cage
because lions eat anything.
 
Later that day a new lion arrives at
the zoo. He wanders up to another
lion and says "What's the food like here?"
 
 
 
The lions say: "Absolutely brilliant,
 
today we had Fish and Chimps with Mushy Bees
 
 

Offline Rik

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Offline Clive

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #714 on: March 08, 2011, 18:22 »
 :pmsl:  Most of those were from 2003.   ;D

Offline Rik

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #715 on: March 08, 2011, 18:22 »
Three were. ;D
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Offline Simon

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #716 on: March 08, 2011, 18:23 »
:pmsl:
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Offline Rik

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #717 on: March 08, 2011, 18:27 »
 :laugh:
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Rik

Offline Rodders

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #718 on: March 28, 2011, 00:41 »
A mate of mine recently admitted he was addicted to brake fluid.  When I quizzed him about it he reckoned he could stop any time.

Offline Simon

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Re: Groaner thread
« Reply #719 on: March 28, 2011, 01:07 »
:aarrgh:
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