Topic: A MARRIAGE OF FACT

[Clive]

Bob was about to marry Caroline when his father took him to one side
'When I married your mother, the first thing I did when we got home
was take off my trousers,' he said. 'I gave them to your mother and
told her to put them on.' When she did, they were enormous on her
and she said to me that she couldn't possibly wear them, as they were
too large. I told her, "Of course they're too big. I wear the trousers
in this family and I always will." Ever since that day, we have never
had a single problem.'

Bob took his father's advice and as soon as he got Caroline alone
after the wedding, he did the same thing; took off his trousers, gave
them to Caroline and told her to put them on. Caroline said that the
trousers were too big and she couldn't possibly wear them. 'Exactly,'
replied Bob. 'I wear the trousers in this relationship and I always
will. I don't want you to forget that.'

Caroline paused and removed her knickers and gave them to Bob. 'Try
these on,' she said, so he tried them on but they were too small. 'I
can't possibly get into your knickers,' said Bob. 'Exactly,' replied
Caroline. 'And if you don't change your bloody attitude, you never
will.'

[Simon]

Ouch!